Many
members have gotten into the spirit of "You
know you're a modeler when ... " The January
issue of MA hit the streets and my
mailbox filled with so many adaptations of
Jeff Foxworthy's famous comic line that I'm
looking into a book deal on the subject.
Those who follow this column regularly will remember
that last month was the "What We Did With Your
Dues in 2007" annual report. I realize it was
not nearly as funny but hopefully it was
informative.
To make up for the "boring annual report" (as it was
referred to by the staff), I'm devoting most
of my column to the membership's responses.
Jeff Prosise
of Knoxville, Tennessee, starts us out this
month.
You know you're a modeler when:
"You spent more on your last airplane than on
your last car.
"You can name more AMA presidents than US
presidents.
"Your wife says 'You're going to have to
choose between me and flying,' and without
hesitating you reply, 'I'll miss you, honey.'
"It's 36 degrees and sleeting and you're
standing in the pit area wondering 'Where is
everybody?'
"You're in a car accident on the way to the
field and you have to climb over two
unconscious passengers to check the condition
of your plane.
"You test-fit the family cat into the cockpit
of your 33% Extra and seriously consider
giving it a try.
"A friend asks what kind of cologne you're
wearing and you reply, 'Wildcat 30%.'
"The most exciting thing that's ever happened
to you was when your buddy took off with his
ailerons reversed and then had his throttle
servo fail, too.
"Your idea of an engaging dinner conversation
is a lively debate on the merits of castor
oils versus synthetics.
"Your mom and dad find magazines hidden under
your mattress and are relieved to find it's
only Model Aviation.
"A psychologist administers a Rorschach test
and upon seeing the first ink blot, you scream
'Corsair!'
"Your wife says she'd like to see you more
often and you give her a map to the field.
"Your wife whispers 'wanna have some fun?' and
you run down to your shop to put a plane on
charge.
"You come to the field with a black eye
because you told your wife her CG's too far
aft."
Jeff finally adds, "I recently got my turbine
waiver and am addicted to jets. Here are a few
for jet pilots." You know you're a jet modeler
when:
"The best use you can find for propellers is
mixing epoxy.
"You install surround sound in your living
room just so your family can enjoy your
turbine videos.
"10,000 rpm? That's for wienies.
"The most popular artist on your iPod is
JetCat.
"You decide your van with 240,000 miles on it
can go one more year so you can buy a new
turbine.
"You prefer the smell of Jet A to coffee in
the morning."
Dan Krahenbuhl of Appleton, Wisconsin,
contributed to the list. You know you're a
modeler when:
"Your youngest daughter knows that ARF is not
the sound a dog makes.
"Your family makes plans based on the aviation
forecast.
"During flying season you will only commit to
non-flying events out to the five-day aviation
forecast.
"Your wife checks the forecast prior to even
bringing up any plans.
"Long-distance vacations include spending an
afternoon at a distant flying field.
"There are only two seasons in Wisconsin:
building and flying.
"You look upon people who are indifferent to
flying like you would someone dressing up and
attending a Star Trek convention (the same
holds true for people who electrify warbirds).
"When shopping for a new vehicle for the
family, how future planes will fit in it is a
major consideration. (If it will require a
five-year loan, what size plane will I be up
to by that point?)
"You let your wife quit her job forever in
return for being allowed to fly guilt-free on
Saturdays.
"You base prices of things on what it would
buy in terms of airplanes and airplane-related
equipment. ($200 is a 120-size ARF, $450 a
43cc gasser, etc. Warning: It can make grocery
shopping and buying school clothes for the
kids depressing.)
"You commonly replace the phrase 'I know that
like the back of my hand' or 'as sure as the
sun will rise tomorrow' with 'as sure as
Father's Day I will be out flying!'
"On a rainy day you cheer yourself up by
wearing the smelly shirt you last wore flying
that reeks of spent nitro.
"You spend enough time at the local hobby shop
that they carry your brands of fuel, props,
etc. without you ordering them.
"Your wife is better able to cope with the
long, cold Wisconsin winters knowing that
Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, and
Valentine's Day are all guaranteed non-flying
days!"
I would be
remiss in not noting the retirement of two
key members of the AMA staff. Coming back from
the holidays I found not one, but two
resignation letters on my desk. The first was
from Mary Hurn, director of AMA's Human
Resources Department.
Mary's is a support position that those outside of the
building rarely hear about, but it is key to
the successful operation of the organization.
Mary has been with us for more than 12 years
and will be missed.
Jay Mealy, director of the Programs Department, is also
retiring. He is much more visible to the
membership and attends many trade shows
representing the AMA. Jay has been with AMA
for more than 15 years. His service and
dedication to the Academy's goals will also be
missed.
Please join me in wishing Mary and Jay good luck and
Godspeed in their retirements.
During this
past season many clubs participated in the
Take off And Grow program (TAG). My old club
in Texarkana, Texas, was one of those selected
to participate.
Be on the lookout for the 2008 TAG applications
available on the AMA Web site. The program is
being revised for 2008. This year, funding
will be supplied rather than equipment to
encourage clubs to host events. MA
Texarkana Club
President Davis Oats guides TAG visitors in
the
use of an AMA-supplied simulator.
Members of the
Texarkana Club, Charlie McCarty (L) and
retired
airline pilot Bud Welch, help in the 2007 TAG
program.
In the spirit of flight.
Jim Cherry, Executive Director
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